Saturday, June 13, 2015

Summery Summer Stuff

Jonas turned 7 months old.  This is all going by so fast!  Before I know it, I won't have a tiny baby to love on anymore.   

He has recently become very independent and likes to go off on his own through the house exploring all the different rooms.  But only if its on his terms.  If he crawls off down the hall, fine.  But if I walk out of the room, end of the world.  haha  His favorite is to go into Clark and Kalvin's room.  Apparently they have the most exciting stuff.  But that means that they have had to be extra careful about leaving marbles or rocks and what-not on the floor.  Jonas thinks its great.  I'll hear him scooting down the hall and just squealing and screaming with excitement as he makes his way to a new room.  I love it so much. 

He is eating and sleeping pretty good.  Still room for improvement.  He loves peaches the most.  Its been such a pain though, because Jonas is one who HAS to have something in his hands at all times.  Doesn't matter what, just something.  He squirms and screams and lunges and them you put something in his hand and he immediately calms down.  But that makes feeding time hard, because its his mission in life to hold that spoon or grab the bowl of food.  Its always a process getting dinner down him.  Some nights he wins, some nights I win,  (And yeah, I've tried giving him a spoon of his own to hold.  He hucks it and tries to grab the one with food on it.) 

I often catch the boys teasing both they baby and the dog with food that they cant have... 

We've been swimming lots.  Its been so fun and the boys are already getting the most gorgeous tans.  They are lucky they got Brads beautiful olive skin.  They love playing in the water and then we come home and they get straight in the wading pool. 

And no one is enjoying all the summer fruit as much as Clark.  I think he ate an entire cantaloupe all by himself. 

Little buddy loves it when we put his jumper in the doorway so he can see outside and watch Scout running back and forth barking at the neighbor dogs. 

We had a nice storm move in a few nights ago.  We lost power a few times, but thats pretty normal for this town.  haha   

So strange that its June and we have had such cold days here and there.  To be honest, I kinda hate Summer.  Its my least favorite season.  I think growing up in Southern Nevada ruined it for me.  Its so blasted hot down there that Summer time means you cant hardly set foot outside without wanting to die.  Its miserable.  But, I think that Lovelock weather is bringing me around a little bit.  As long as these storms keep passing through to cool things off every few weeks. 

Waffles at 10:30 in the morning.  Is there anything better?! 

They finish the grapes before I can even get them out of the grocery bag to the fridge.  We watch a movie a day and read lots.  The boys have been particularly into the poem books lately.  And they love to read in bed each night before they fall asleep. 

Clark has finally learned to ride his bike without training wheels!!  Hes been working on this for a looooong time.  But our sweet little cautious boy just wasn't feeling it after 20 or so crashes.  But Brad finally convinced him to give it another try after months of not wanting to even discuss it and he got on and took off.  It was amazing.  Something just clicked and he is awesome at it.  And Brad is so proud :) 

Kal on the other hand cannot get the hang of pedaling on his tricycle.  And it doesnt bother him one bit.  haha  He prefers to just run along side Clark's bike.  Like a puppy.  haha 

Jonas realized that he can touch the top of his head and its all he does all day.  Its hilarious, because he'll be crying and reach his hands up there and just stop and then start smiling and laughing. He is so weird. 

And so cute 

Brad has been in Fallon this weekend for Stake Youth Conference.  We are ready to have him home!  We are ready to have a weekend where we aren't so busy.  I just dont know when that will be. 

Saturday, June 6, 2015


I have spent the evening preparing my Relief Society lesson for this coming Sunday.  Its on David and Goliath.  I haven't actually read the passage in the bible probably since High School.  Its such a good story.  My favorite though is typing it into the church website's search and reading all the different General Authorities thoughts and feelings about it.  So many lessons learned in just one chapter.  So much that is applicable to my own life.  Isn't it crazy how so long ago, all of the battles and challenges that we read about now were so often physical and today, the majority of the battles fought and challenges faced are spiritual and internal?  When I try to picture what it would be like to raise children in world like that of the scriptures with all of the wars and instability and poverty, its hard to catch my breath.  I can't imagine.  I would be so scared all the time.  But then I think about how the war that my children face in this day and age is just as real and just as frightening.  And there goes my breath again.....      

There are oh so many challenges that I hope to one day overcome.  So many weaknesses that frustrate me.  But of all of them, the one that gets to me the very most, is fear.  Fear is my Goliath.  I hate it.  It ruins everything.  It creeps up on me and can ruin the most pleasant of moments, the most beautiful of days, the most wonderful sleep.  I have always had it.  Even when I was a kid, I found plenty to be scared of.  I had nightmares night after night.  My amazing Mom had all the patience in the world with me and taught me each night to pray for peace and sleep.  I learned as a 7 year old girl that my Mom had lots of faith, I remember knowing that if she said the prayer, that I would be just fine and I would fall asleep feeling safe and sound.  If I said the prayer... I still felt a little shakey. haha  But it made me realize as just a little girl that I needed to have faith to make it through this world without being utterly terrified all the time.  And that I could only rely on my Mom's faith for so long. 

Twenty-something years later and I still struggle with it.  What I fear has changed and evolved, but its still there.  I worry so much about every little thing and its just exhausting.  And its just so useless.  I know that.  I get it.  Brad always tells me, "Whats going to happen is going to happen.  Worrying won't change anything."  He's right.  It makes perfect sense.  But then I lay awake at night and cant shut off my brain.  haha 

I am working on it.  Everyday I try to make a conscious effort to be stronger.  I pray for it.  I pray for a better faith.  Faith like David had when he faced Goliath.  The scriptures say that he "ran toward the army to meet Goliath."  Are you kidding me?!  Its one thing to face your fears and challenges, but to run toward them?!  That really stood out to me when I read it this time around.  I want so badly to have faith like that.

But even more, I want my children to have faith like that!  That has become so much more important to me than anything else.  This world is scary.  Its crumbling around us.  Its a fight.  I don't want my children to have any fear.  I want them to be strong and faithful and run to meet the challenges of this life. 

I think that often times parents, with all the best intentions, get caught up in the "protection" side of parenting.  (me being one of them)  But I have realized just how important it is to prepare your children.  Because sheltering only lasts so long.  Its a nice (and tempting) thought.  To gather your chicks under your wing and know that they are always safe.  But its unrealistic.  And harmful.  The words sting as they come from my lips, but we are preparing the Lord's soldiers.  These tiny, precious babies are here to fight.  They are here to face real and unavoidable evil.  All the evil that is spilling into every corner of the world and more.  They will see things in the years to come that we will not.  They will face things that we never had to.  And we won't be able to be with them every step of the way.

The best thing we can ever do for our children is prepare them.  Prepare them by teaching them about God and Faith and Prayer and all of the courage that comes from having a Testimony. 

I desperately want this for my children.  I want them to have Testimonies.  I want the Holy Ghost to follow them where I can't.  I want the scriptures and the words of the Prophets to settle deep into their minds, smothering all doubt and immoveable in times of trial and questioning.   

I want them to run fearlessly toward the enemy 

I want them to know that the Lord is on their side 

I am so proud of the people they are becoming! 

They are so full of good, its just so inspiring to witness. 

They see the world as it should be, which I think is how the Lord sees it too. 

I am lucky I have them to keep me focused and keep me trying to be stronger and better 

And thank heavens for Brad!  So faithful and so patient with my worries.   

With help from the Lord and these 4 loves, Goliath really doesn't seem so big and bad after all.