So this is my last month of pregnancy. I am officially 8 months along. This month is always so weird for me. I always feel so tired of being pregnant. I feel like everyone in the entire world has had their babies except me. I feel so ready to finally meet what I have been growing for the better part of a year. I feel ready for things to get back to normal and start figuring out how life is suppose to be with a new little person in it. But then at the same time, I always feel like I am being rushed. I just want things to slow down, because before I know it, he will be here and everything will be different and I just want to enjoy how good things are right now. I feel ready and not at all ready, all at the same time. People always say that this month lasts forever and while I am uncomfortable and exhausted, I always feel like this last month flies by. No more counting months or weeks even.. its counting days. That is intense. I guess its normal. To spend every second thinking about the baby and just wanting to hold him so much, but feeling so unprepared and just wanting a little more time. I am sure a big portion of this is crazy pregnant lady hormones. I have been having insane mood swings and that has never really happened to me before. Its super weird and I think I am scaring Brad a little, cause my other pregnancies were not this way. Like the other day, I for no reason at all, felt on the verge of tears all day long. And then when we caught a mouse in our living room, it apparently was too much and I cried. I dont know if it was because the mouse wasn't all the way dead in the trap and I felt bad or because I couldn't believe something so gross was in our house. I have no clue. There is no way of knowing. But I feel like a basket case and hope that these hormones go away quick, before another preview for Dora the Explorer makes me cry. (no.. I am not kidding. It makes me cry every. dang. time.) So anyway, this baby will be here soon and I am so excited and so not ready. But feeling so so so blessed. Brad and I get a little stressed sometimes, but then we go in to the boys room and see Clark and Kalvin sleeping so soundly in their tiny beds, all bundled up and so incredibly perfect, and we really can not wait to meet our next little miracle. Cant wait to see his face and hold him and watch how much he changes everything in our family. |
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