Thursday, October 23, 2014

My Last Month

So this is my last month of pregnancy.  I am officially 8 months along.  This month is always so weird for me.  I always feel so tired of being pregnant.  I feel like everyone in the entire world has had their babies except me.  I feel so ready to finally meet what I have been growing for the better part of a year.  I feel ready for things to get back to normal and start figuring out how life is suppose to be with a new little person in it.  But then at the same time, I always feel like I am being rushed.  I just want things to slow down, because before I know it, he will be here and everything will be different and I just want to enjoy how good things are right now.  I feel ready and not at all ready, all at the same time.  People always say that this month lasts forever and while I am uncomfortable and exhausted, I always feel like this last month flies by.  No more counting months or weeks even.. its counting days.  That is intense.  I guess its normal.  To spend every second thinking about the baby and just wanting to hold him so much, but feeling so unprepared and just wanting a little more time.  I am sure a big portion of this is crazy pregnant lady hormones.  I have been having insane mood swings and that has never really happened to me before.  Its super weird and I think I am scaring Brad a little, cause my other pregnancies were not this way.  Like the other day, I for no reason at all, felt on the verge of tears all day long.  And then when we caught a mouse in our living room, it apparently was too much and I cried.  I dont know if it was because the mouse wasn't all the way dead in the trap and I felt bad or because I couldn't believe something so gross was in our house.  I have no clue.  There is no way of knowing.  But I feel like a basket case and hope that these hormones go away quick, before another preview for Dora the Explorer makes me cry. (no.. I am not kidding.  It makes me cry every. dang. time.)  So anyway, this baby will be here soon and I am so excited and so not ready.  But feeling so so so blessed.  Brad and I get a little stressed sometimes, but then we go in to the boys room and see Clark and Kalvin sleeping so soundly in their tiny beds, all bundled up and so incredibly perfect, and we really can not wait to meet our next little miracle.  Cant wait to see his face and hold him and watch how much he changes everything in our family.   

So to make up for our fun Saturday off, Brad brought a ton of boxes in from the garage and we opened them all up and started sorting and organizing and putting stuff away.

And our house looked like this for days and days and drove me absolutely crazy!  The problem is that we dont have a lot of places to put things, because we don't have the same amount of furniture that we use to have.  We opened up a bunch of boxes and realized that we use to have 3 book cases and a china hutch and now we don't and have no where for our books or my teacup collection or a hundred other little things.  We will eventually, but this house is a work-in-progress and it will take some time.  And then I unpacked and washed and folded ALL of our laundry and then realized that we have no where to put any of it.  Our bedroom is too small for the dresser we have and the closet is tiny.  After days of Brad trying to convince me that we should just keep our clothes in our dresser on the deck off of our bedroom, we ordered a dresser that will fit in the room.

So I spent a few days working on finding a place for things and repacking what we don't have a place for right now and our house is looking MUCH better.  You can see the floor again and sit on the couch again and it is great.  I am exhausted, but it feels so good to have that done.  I have dishes in my kitchen and my makeup isn't in baggies and we now have an actual place for mail and for pens and pencils, so we dont have to go searching for hours if we ever need to write something.  It magical.  I will never ever take for granted again, not living out of boxes!

So Brad's work has been going really well.  He is in the process of hiring a new office worker, so thats been interesting.  He is like interviewing people and stuff.  Its a new experience for him, but he is a boss at being the boss, so thats good.  He has some great regular patients who bring him things like cookies or fresh eggs and I love more than anything when people come up to me and tell me how much my husband has helped them in therapy and how amazing he is.  Makes me feel so proud of the man!!!  I married a pretty awesome guy.

It has been cooling off a lot here.  The evenings and nights get down into the 40's.  In fact, I think this week we will be down into the 30's at night.  So having this hot tub has been freaking amazing!!  I can never ever go back.  Especially while being pregnant.  All the back and hip pain and all the pressure, just melts away in that nice warm water.  And don't worry, its not too hot.  We keep it set at the same temp as just a warm bath, so its safe for the baby and for me and for the little boys.  (I have had a lot of people with a lot of opinions talk to me about that) 

The boys LOVE it.  They beg every night after dinner to go swimming in the outside tub.  It has been so much fun. 

Kalvin, my little angel baby.  I love spending the days with him.  He is going to be such a good big brother!  He is ready for sure.  He still talks about his baby brother all the time. 

I have been craving turkey lately, so Brad, being the man he is, made me a little turkey last sunday for dinner and it was amazing!  I love having all the leftovers for things like soup and sandwiches and stuff.  I could eat turkey everyday! 

Kalvin took it upon himself the other day to color with his crayons all over he and Clark's sheets on their beds.  He has never done that before.  I was shocked.  He felt so bad and cried for like an hour while I had him help me take the sheets off the beds and wash them.   

Hopefully he sticks to his paper and coloring books now.  He loves coloring so much. 

Clark had a school project to paint a pumpkin like a character from one of his favorite books.  And being the awesome parents that we are, put it off til the night before it was due.  We had to go through a ton of boxes to find his books and then when we realized we had no idea where any of the craft paint was, Brad got out the interior paint and mixed gray, red and yellow to make a fleshy sort of color and then we just used a magic marker for the face.  Kind of a scary looking Mr. Brown, but Clark was pretty proud of it, so its all good. 

Well I think I am all caught up now. 

Life is good and moving forward.  We are busy in all the best ways and most days I look around and can't believe that I am as lucky as I am.  That we live in such a great place and that we have such a pretty little house and that we have such perfect little boys and that we are going to have another one who is just as perfect and that I am married to my best friend.  I can honestly say that I am completely content right now and that its a pretty good feeling!

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